yun akele

Milon door itne aa gaye
saqii na sathi sath mere

Kuch yaad aap is kadar aaye
Aah meri goonji thi jehan mein

jabki malooom hai ye humko
yaadein aapki shamil hai mujhme

wirane mein sans lete hue
Hum sisak siask ke roye

jaise barsa ho koi akela badal
kuch is tarah hum bhi tadpe

Naya hai manzar saamne mere
par khud ko yun majboor pata hoon.

har kadam jo aage rakhta hoon
sochta hoon kuch choot gaya piche mere

ek dor dil ko kasak deti hai yun,
chupa sa jo hai naqaab mein kahin

afsana mera kali syahi hai.
yun dile azaab utara hai yahan.

shayad aap samjhe ek din lafzon ko,
jo bolti hai yahan ki likhawat mein.

Who's Blame?

Pain becomes a frontier which when you realize you have touched it, you cry foul. Then we turn to blame someone and then perhaps God. At any rate if you analyze that who is to really blame, its you, your carelessness and may be your expectations. Actually carelessness is a superset of of having expectations from anything, not only luck or some real person, i mean anything. For at the onset only, you position yourself on wrong grounds. Life is a game and to play it, make yourself flexible. Hope is certainly a good trait but clinging one's life to it leads to disaster. Yes, its true that even then something bad happens and gives you pain. But a attitude where you make expectations less and less, actually gives to hope, or better say gives you ray of light to see all in a new way. Solutions to all twisted cases will appear then. I am not a really spritual person, but i try to analyze myself emotionally and psychologically.

Trip to corpus christi

Living in present

Come to think what does we all live for??

Is it money, happiness, sex or satisfaction??

Lil tricky question for one might say its all so related. But what does we all do?? We hope for a onsite or may be a better pay package or God knows what not?? No one is satisfied and double quote thats a universal truth. In search of a better life or in more accurate description better rewards, what actually we are doing is that we forget the present. I am not here to pass a judgement that everybody does it. But lot many and i mean majority of us have forgetten the basic value of life. That may include me too. (:) ,,,,P.S may be this post is a soul-searching mission.

I was just thinking the other day, what i wanted to do in future when i was young. And I have a quite a lively discussion ( P.S " Lively discussions are dangerous to health. You might be wrecking a relationship or may be you would be at least creating a rift .........especially if you do tell the truth)


to be continued..

I have an attitude problem

Just wanted to pen down my experiences when i have been told " You have an attitude problem".

PART 1
**************

I was in PESIT that time. Probably 5th sem, as far as i can be sure of. I had that same old attendance shortage.(seriously i dont why i like sleeping during daytime and ASAS has been there with me from childhood. No medical reasons though).

So i had that ASAS problem (Attendance shortage as usual). Our college has got quite an image there in Bangalore ( RVCE is school, BMSCE is club and PESIT JAIL..ha ha). You got to believe me for i have BEEN THERE and DONE THAT. Nearly all backbenchers had that. So five of us went to HOD. He never listened to any excuse and why should he?? He was the jailor , and we were the chickens...
So to issue admit cards, we were told to call our parents. Now the catch was other four were from south india and agreed with that mute expressionless face down approach. I got angry and i told the truth. My dad is a doctor and he cant come. He is the one reason, i am paying up 50000 rs per year and enjoying in bangalore. And then why he should be punished for my fault? If you see me wrong, spank me...why do you want to skin my dad's ass??

NAHH...i forgot that he was the jailer and we f*****g chickens.
The serious shit is that he is not even considering anything and just kept on increasing his volume. Now the threshold of arguing of mine reached with all that endothermic approach. Hey i was at the receiving end and he was the one erupting uncontrollably.

I walked out. No apologies and a simple statement : : NO USE SIR, YOU ARE NOT READY TO LISTEN TO ME
Next day deputy HOD called and diagnosed me that i have ATTITUDE PROBLEM.

I started sweating profusely. I thought where i would land up now. What will Dad say? Mom would CRy!!
Shit i am no chicken. ha ha ha ha

I was the Kangaroo who jumped over the fence.

H a h a Ha HA ...dont take me seriously EVER again><><><

I just had a smirk and he and i had a long chat over views regarding this. But he listened to me and for that i had to respect him. He was would be jailer who at that time did not had the pressures of HOD chair and had no responsibility to act like one.


PART TWO
****************

I was in sterlite deputed to the new project at BALCO. My boss was good hardworking sort. So there i was with One real chicken pooja, one really cool dude bhaiya and a replica of my boss without the ability to shout at others, karthik.

So he allotted me work on site and gave other two bhaiya and pooja work near to main office, where we had coffee machines, AC , computer and easy exit from PLANT. I worked for some days and then i could not tolerate this injustice and said why i have to work more?? to Mr Sunil sir.

His response is imprinted in my mental images folder. Hand to head with head down and elbow on table, I knew the physical way of saying " YOU HAVE AN ATTITUDE PROBLEM"

Then he explained and trying to unload my not so heavy workload.

This was one time when i really felt i have that A.P

Mom would cry and Dad would kill me.

ha ha..

PART3
***********

Time and GOD

To be true this thought cropped in a place where u know u have got to go for one time atleast during 24 hours.

Think of What would be man greatest victory?

I mean if we keep having technical advances,discoveries and inventions at whatever pace we have been doing. Just what would make us feel GOD? What i thought of was time. Every moment is being eaten up by that tool of nature TIME, like a big Boa constrictor nibbling its prey. However you might try, you can not make yourself out of that trap. A moment gone is gone.

But what if we really had that time machine. Then can there be a GOD?

God for me is a distant reality, stress that reality word though. I describe myself as being on the cusp of a vertical bend of two roads of belief and astheism. Taking that in positive sense will make you realize that i am just being inquisitive, for i see a conflict in what i was taught and what i see.

Now back to that Time thing. Aint it would make us equal to God. What else could negate our superiority then. Now consider this if you are in a prison and though you are well fed, you are not allowed to go out. What would you call the person or authority which locked you in.?

Good or Evil??

I say evil . Then in a similar sense we are at mercy of time which makes us a part of this world only to a limited extent. So the thing which controls time becomes evil. Dont you agree??

That means time is not God,s tool but Devil's.

Point to ponder is that time is widely respected. Ever thought that wrong??

ha ha

shayari....

Takluffon ke jam bana ke , pite hain askon ke sath.
Wirane mein baithe yun, tanhai se zuftazu karte hain.
dile tahkhane mein chupe hazar gam, yun ek muskan ke sath.
kuch askon ke syahi se aaj, yen nagame pirote hain.

lakh dewane

Lakh diwane yun teri surat ke didar ko,
pal pal mitne ko bekarar hote hain,
lazabab hai teri berukhi ki talwar bhi,
aasiqkon ki aahein galiyon mein bichati ho.

GEOFFREY's

Bhaiya ..Dude log khel rahe hain ..dekh lijiye!!!

Take you back

You are cover of my soul,
I am not whole without you,
Hate becomes naked in me.
All veils should come down.

Look through your eyes.
You will see truth.
Smile for their fate.
What they await is death,

Make way in the wilds,
Tear skies with bare hands
In dreams i seek you,
Dont cry any more,

I will Have revenge.
I smell only blood,
seek them till hell,
destiny will ask mercy,

I seek what i want,
Finish what they started,
Hate is my fuel,
They will burn to bones,

Tell them i will come,
They will pay for sure,
Not an easy death,
Dont cry any more,

Come to pluck you out,
Thorns will be crushed.
I will burn them to hell
This oath will be true.

I claim your soul

Kneel before me and cry,
your agonies please me,
i feel no hope in you,
can you see your fate,
Now i claim your soul

Banish you to hell,
No mercy for you,
I am your God,
cast your virtue aside,
Now i claim your soul.

You will not have pride,
Lick my toes gain,
I stand, you plead,
Beg for mercy gain.
Now I claim your soul.

For your sins you repent,
You had a easy death,
Justice you will have,
And there is no escape,
Now i claim your soul.

Fear i can smell in you,
Tremble for your fate,
See my eyes gleam,
I have you till eternity,
Now i claim your soul.